Like every company that lives and dies by the quarterly performance of their direct sales team (what I’ll safely call “everyone”), Jigsaw goes into a state of hyperactivity bordering on complete pandemonium in the last days and hours of the fiscal quarter. We order in lunch for sales, get execs on planes, curse the fact that March 31 is a Sunday, collectively storm the finance and legal department to process contracts and generally pull our pants down for anyone that can potentially spend money. It’s not pretty, but it’s the American Way.
Tips and tactics for salespeople at quarter end you can find just about anywhere, and they all seem to be written by people that never carried a bag or have crossed over to the fairyland world of the customer (note- For the most part I’m there now and it is sweet- may I never have to format another discount schedule into Word at 4:50 PM on New Year’s Eve again!). Salespeople would love to spread their deals evenly over the year, but the world won’t let them. Even the freak of nature that prospects daily, buys all his Christmas presents by Halloween and follows every Miller Heiman step to the letter gets forced into the salmon spawn fracas that is the last day of the selling period.
What I’m going to list today is 5 tips for all non-sales people (what I’ll call “overhead”) for the quarter end.
5- Marketing people: Now is not the time to ask salespeople for references or what they think about the latest webinar. We don’t even have time to check out the new intern. How about a well placed Public Relations moment (like our company just named “master of the universe” by Gartner) that I can share with my prospect?
4- If you are an engineer, unless you are working on a product that I’m going to deliver as part of the big deal, there is “nothing you can do.” Thank you; please keep up the good work. But we don’t log in and peer over your shoulder in between World of Warcraft sessions while you code- so back to your hole.
3- Sales managers: sales people need you to ride them on Feb. 15th about their pipeline. By March 31st you just need to be giving a united front to the CFO as to why we should be selling our product for pennies on the dollar. Any other communication from you at this time is completely useless- which should feel normal.
2- Sales VP: If you are as big a rainmaker as you originally sold to the CEO and board then you should be parked in the office of the executive buyer of every big deal with knee pads and a massage chair. Otherwise see number 3.
1- Everyone else: The only requests being fulfilled from salespeople originate from the customers at the top of the commit line with today’s date on it. You want to do something? Get me a sandwich and another diet coke.
You forgot:
CFO: Stop distracting me with moans of how the discounts are impacting the "model". Make legal go faster, simplify or eliminate the 20 page of legal bull that we ultimately cave on anyway or go close some list price deals yourself. Are we not a "team"?
Posted by: Jeff B - aka | April 11, 2008 at 04:35 AM
Jeff B-
That's a good one. My favorite type of CFO is the one that fancies himself a negotiator and takes it as a personal goal to not give in on Force Majuere or some other nit. Dude, you can be the tough guy with our vendors- I'm sure they have contracts on your desk, too- you're on my team for this one. Jackass.
Posted by: Garth | April 11, 2008 at 10:34 AM
I also forgot-
Salespeople that already closed their deal(s): Please remove yourself from the sales bullpen or risk getting prison shanked. We couldn't care less "what worked for you." I'm sure there is someone else (the sales manager is a good candidate) who wants to hear how great you are. If you are such a bigshot you should be out golfing, where I would be if I wasn't waiting on this f&$*ing contract.
Posted by: Garth | April 11, 2008 at 10:41 AM